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I wish it didn’t bother me so much, but edgelord kids spouting off random acephobia just ports me back years ago when I just thought I was a broken person. I was ostracized in school all the same, didn’t matter. I tried forcing myself into relationships that only ended up damaging me in the end. Being told I was a disappointment, being told I wasn’t complete, being told I wasn’t valid.
I wasn’t even away what asexuality was until my early twenties, and I have to wonder how much less pain I would have had if I had at least known I wasn’t alone.
Asexuality is to sexuality as atheism is to theism. It’s not another type of thing, it’s the lack of it altogether. I honestly don’t think it belongs with LGBT. It’s just not the same issue.
I thought LGBTA was a safe space for all people of different sexual orientation
. Cause, you know asexual is one of them.
And considering I grew up thinking I was broken and something was wrong with me until I got education outside school and figured out who I was with LGBTA sites and people.
I grew up with family members saying they were disappointed I would never have children. You haven’t met the right person yet! You need therapy, there’s something wrong with you. Everyone needs someone to be complete! You just need to try harder!
I forced relationships because I believed those fucking lies. I let people coerce me into doing things deep down I know I didn’t want. And I still felt nothing. Men? Well no, I have close friends, had people I cared for but I feel nothing. Women? Anyone? Same fucking result. NOTHING.
I WISH I could have easily known what I was then. it would have saved me so much pain.
I wish someone told me it was okay to want a close relationship without anything sexual. That I didn’t need to fuck someone to make a relationship meaningful. That a close platonic relationship is just as valid.
Because I AM SO FUCKING TIRED OF GATEKEEPERS DEEMING ME NOT IMPORTANT ENOUGH IN SAFE SPACES.
So you can kindly fuck off if you think excluding aces is ok because its “not the same issue.”
Not sure why this post started floating around again but I reread it and was reminded how much of similar stuff I STILL hear every day.
I don’t even like discussing it with many people because I’m either dismissed or met with jokes. My parents are very well meaning and try to understand but sometimes underhanded stuff still slips through. Strangers and acquaintances seem to always think they would know myself better than me and parrot the same lines I hear so often again and again and again.
I guess that explains why I always had at least one very close platonic relationship going on at a time. Love was there, just not anything romantic or sexual. But I know it was love, I deeply cared for this person, I would do anything for this person. Growing up I just figured the other stuff would naturally follow, but it never did. Caused a lot of pain and bullying that only reinforced my idea that I was broken.
I’m doing much better knowing what I know now, and I have a deep relationship I’m truly happy with.
I’m asexual. Yesterday, while having sexual education class, my teacher said tat the only sexual orientations were heterosexuality, homosexuality and bisexuality. So I asked her why nobody talked about asexuality in sexual education classes. This is what she said: “That’s because asexuality isn’t a sexual orientation. Asexuality is a disease. Asexual people were born wrong, because everybody feels sexual attraction.” And then, the bell rang and she leaved the classroom. Guess who cried for about… 15 minutes? Yeah, me. All my classmates saw me, and one of them (a girl who I thought that was my friend, and she already knew about my asexuality) asked to me: “So you have that disease??”. I’m tired. I’m so fucking tired. It is horrible being told that “it is a phase” or that “you haven’t met the right person yet” or, even worse, “it’s a disease”.
To all the asexuals out there, stay strong.
Asexuality is not a disease.
Asexuality is not a disease.
Asexuality is not a disease.
Your teacher is wrong. She basically said that asexual people are broken and that there’s something wrong with them, which is so not true. I will fight anyone who says that aces are broken.
There is nothing wrong with asexual people.
Dunno why I posted this on my personal blog… oops. Point still stands!
Fuck that teacher. She can just stop teaching, right now.
My LGBT Studies professor denied that asexuality existed and eluded to believing that genders outside of the binary are “a fad.” Guess who dropped that class after the first day?
how?? the fuck??? did they??? get?? that job?????
When I was in high school I joined the LGBTA club as an ally. That’s what I really thought the A stood for.
Growing up and sincerely believing the “not meeting the right person yet” did so much damage to me. Getting close to someone and still feeling completely repulsed by the idea of me doing anything sexual, I honestly did think I was broken. For awhile I truly believed I couldn’t possibly love a partner if there was nothing sexual behind it.
I found out about Asexuality in my mid twenties. It was like a bolt of lightning. “Oh! This perfectly explains what I am! I wish I knew this sooner!”
It explained why I held such a strong platonic relationship with Tara. I want to be with her. I want to protect her.
I love her.
Platonicly. I feel for her so strongly I can’t really put it into words, but again, platonicly. (She’s my squish)
I thought kids learning about this stuff much earlier are so lucky but some of the same bullshit still resides in safe spaces. “Straight Passing,” “platonic is boring, this is for people with REAL problems”. Its so frustrating to still be invisible in a place you’d think would understand you.
I’m sorry you had to deal with someone like this. Especially as such a vulnerable age. Just remember,
